Advice: You Ask, We Answer

By Lexi Miller

Anonymous: There's a close friend of mine who talks about herself like 90% of the time. Sometimes, I feel like she just gives me statements about herself and expects me to create a conversation with them. I feel like because of this, all I want to do is talk about myself with my other friends. What do you think I should do? Am I not being clear enough about wanting to discuss other topics? Should I call her out? Am I being self-centered myself, since I don't want to listen to my friend talk about herself?

Lexi: I don't know what steps you have tried, but I would suggest trying to change the subject when she begins to talk about herself too much. If you have already tried this and it has become a huge problem (like if she literally only talks about herself), tell her nicely. She may not even realize that it's happening! Tell her that it's not because you don't care about her, but you like talking to her and you want to hear what she has to say about lots of things. If she continues to do it - perhaps she's not that great of a friend? If you do decide to confront her, be careful how you phrase your words because you don't want to hurt her. To answer your other questions: No. You're not being self centered at all. It is human nature to want to talk about yourself and you probably don't want to hear every detail about her life. I know it can be frustrating, but I wish you the best of luck. 


Anonymous: Hi, I really need help right now. I was in a relationship for almost 2 years and it ended 6 months ago and he was with another girl until a month ago. I found out through a mutual friend that this girl wouldn't let him break up with her twice, and he finally did. My friend said that he broke up with me because he didn't want to "play me" and when asked about me, said, "she probably hates me now". I DID, but I've been thinking about him now and kind of want to talk to him...

Lexi: When you mean, talk to him? Do you mean get back together with him or get closure? Did he break up with you to date the other girl? I'm not quite sure what you are referring to the fact that he didn't want to 'play you'. It's really your call if you want to get back together with him or not. Two years is a long time, especially for the age of most of our readers. I can understand why you would want to talk to him. I think you should talk to him yourself and see where it goes. Remember you broke up for a reason... that may no longer apply, but you should keep it in the back of your mind. 

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