My Subconscious is a Liar

It’s so hard not to fill someone’s silence and spaces with improperly painted meanings. It’s so difficult to imagine they still care for you and love you when they get cold out of nowhere. It’s so perplexing to think that a person who was once so talkative can become so silent, nowhere to be found. More than anything, it is perplexing to discover that an expressive person can be so bad at communicating bad emotions.

People aren’t perfect. What I've realized now is that it really does take a while and a good slap in the face to comprehend and ingrain that statement in one's mind and act on it accordingly. You’re not perfect. I knew that. I knew I’d get to see you aren’t. It’s just that I didn’t realize that I wasn’t really just prepared to experience, first-hand, someone’s imperfections; especially the ones that you can’t see, ones that can essentially affect communication or a relationship.

I expected you to be everything I wanted you to be. I expected you to remain the person I saw the first time we met. I expected you to be constant great first impressions. I expected you to stay sweet, expressive, communicative, interactive, intellectually and emotionally stimulating, romantic, reassuring, and understanding. I didn’t think someone like you could be overwhelmed, distant, dry, annoying, scary, neglecting and busy. I forget you’re not just a one-dimensional persona. You’re a multi-dimensional, ever-changing living entity.

Text and Visuals by Samantha Fabian


  1. Replies
    1. thank you so so much, i really appreciate your words, you're so kind!! <3

  2. LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS. Those visuals are soo demonstrative.